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 So Hungry
Dancing Coyote
post Jul 18 2010, 02:23 AM
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Yeah, well I was doing meditations (in a haunted very highly charged place) and reached a very energetically aware state of being. I was this energetic being and very hungry, it was like being awake for the first time in my life. Through this being's eyes I saw the power node, the source of the hauntings and suffering; it looked to me like food, (I was very hungry) and I ate the thing. Immediately afterwards I was ecstatic, rolling in visual hallucinations while I was metabolizing this energy. Afterwards I was aware, and very aware of being hungry. I feel if I continue eating I will change, something more, something I was meant to be. This life is mundane comparatively, I had an awareness I've never seen before: able to see with a sort of radar, energetic beings were surrounded by my outer 'aura' and I could see all sides of them, and I would 'smell' them, if they served no purpose they were consumed. I've been afraid of falling back into what I now refer to as 'slumber' that is the living without this, I have difficulty finding power nodes. I've tried concerts but have yet to find a rager to plug into, meanwhile I've been taking a little from this girl I've been seeing, I hate to do it but I'm so hungry. I have walked to a haunted row of buildings to feed from afar to no avail, I've tried astrial projection, still very little fruition. What kind of being is stuck in this situation? Food all around me, ethics dictates I shal not feed on these beings but ethics also dictates when being is hungry it should eat. This is an interesting situation, feedback?


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kaboom13
post Jul 18 2010, 09:46 AM
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This is supercool. I had the exact same reaction when I pretty much tried to use my left and right brain to basically tele/empathize with people. The whole room exploded, and it was a mix of this nearly orgasmic ecstasy and overwhelming terror.

I'd say that the irony of the hunger that eventually came about was that the hunger we experienced right after that was an intense desire for, in my case, nirvana, more of that absoluteness. I'd actually look inside to find the food you're looking for. You're awake now, and you're never going to fall back into that slumber unless if you make yourself do so. I've found that in the process of consuming myself, that I found a form of fulfillment that I couldn't from consuming other things. Dunno, the Ouroboros/Amon Ra model is actually legitimate.

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Kath
post Jul 19 2010, 07:10 AM
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Energy itself is hugely abundant in the multiverse. Of course that doesn't mean it's very well concentrated or refined though.

It's worth taking the time to learn how to gather it in 'bulk' quantities, and...
it's also worth taking the time to learn how to utilize and/or transmute energies, so that you can readily refine it so you can use and internalize it, rather than depending upon other beings to 'digest' the energy for you.

I'm not criticizing, nor do I think one could master both of these issues overnight.
Just saying it's worth the effort.



also, a 'shortcut':
"deific" energy is 'infinite' in nature, and very highly processed ('digested'), and super-concentrated. It's an inexhaustible resource if you can access it, and I think just working very directly with energy in this manner leads to paradigm shifts which are helpful to one's personal spiritual evolution. Through routinely internalizing this sort of energy, it becomes easier to understand the interconnectedness and flow of energy within 'aum', which can eventually lead to being able to access more energy than you can possibly handle, without directly engaging deity interaction (note: in this I'm referring to what I call 'true deities' which are basically paradoxical beings, persona+infinity, kinda similar to a discarnate bodhisattva. I'm not referring to religious egregores & archetypal figureheads.)

This may seem slightly off topic. I only bring this up because you describe a state of consciousness where you're not existing as a single point, but instead are existing in a very diffuse spread out state. This is just a step or two removed from realizing 'self' as a non-finite concept, and 'place' as more a state of mind. From there, it's not hard to tap into limitless energy, or even warp things so that very abundant energy funnels towards your finite physical body. And then you'll never be hungry again. It reminds me of the old saying "give a man a fish and he eats for a day. teach a man to fish and he eats for a lifetime".

You can end up turning your current situation inside out, becoming a radiant source of energy which leaks energy into your immediate physical surroundings. Instead of being 'hungry'.
not that hunger can't be a slightly exquisite sensation (IMG:style_emoticons/default/bigwink.gif) but that bliss you describe from being sated with really abundant energy is more enjoyable than hunger. And I'm saying it's possible to have that bliss basically "all the time" or at least whenever you put your mind to it. Side effect being that you'd invigorate your surroundings, instead of draining them (assuming that's a consideration).


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kaboom13
post Jul 19 2010, 10:48 AM
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Just curious~

What do you define as a true God, and what do you define as an egregore? Another question since i'm asking them: I've encountered entities or what my brain identified as entities that are literally the multi-verse: dharma, valor, fate etc etc. What would these be considered, and in reference to origins, do you feel that true gods existed before said entities, or was it the other way around?

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Kath
post Jul 19 2010, 01:09 PM
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um, my definition of a 'true deity' is just "an infinite being". which is kinda a paradox, because how can something infinite have a finite persona? but I have it on good authority that such a paradox is possible. The result would be a being which is both finite and infinite. I think of this as something which 'evolves' rather than being made. buddha might qualify. I think some true deities are 'ex humans'. there's no heirarchy, they sort of 'merge'. all infinite beings are kinda like siamese twins with each other. the paradoxical state I mentioned allowing them to manifest as personalized faces of an impersonal infinite.

I contrast that with religious egregores, which are entities created by a group of people, fueled by their belief, energy, etc. egregores are 'man made', and in my view, they are not nearly as impressive as their creators (people). Although with a million followers, an egregore can be 'impressive' in terms of the potency of it's energy, and other such things. it's still a fairly simplistic being which is empowered by the will of people. egregores suffer in much the same way that people don't run very fast in a sack-race. egregores are catering to so many diverse variations on an idea, that they are actually kinda weak without a human standing there getting everyone's religious fervor into a unified sync. I just don't quite see the point of them myself.

archetypal beings are even a bit simpler. 10,000 humans get together and decide that 'fire' is a particular thing, apart from other things. they give 'universal fire-ness' a name, decide what the character looks like, etc. but it's entirely arbitrary. I mean, why have an archetypal fire god, but no archetypal mustard god? I mean, it's hard to eat a hot dog without mustard, this is an important deity... well ok, not really, more like it's an arbitrary personification of a perceived archetype.

in many ways "God" as we often think of him in the west, is both of these, an archetype for absolute 'good', and an egregore based on judeo-roman ideals.

anyway, i think you could meet a 'true deity' (an actual infinite being which is still deific whether anyone worships or not) and you could go around telling people about this being. and in a very short time the group of people you've told will begin pouring their energy & thought into creating an egregore... which is loosely based on an actual deity. I'm sure numerous deities have an origin like this. But that doesn't make the "egregore, based on an actual deity of the same name" any more of an actual infinite being. it's still just an energy mass put together by the collective consciousness of a group of people.

so yeah, I view a true deity as something which exists fully independent of human ideation, worship, areas of land, bodies of water, elemental energies, archetypes of human psychology, nationality, etc. a true deity is just a being which has realized infinite nature, but retained individual identity, a hybrid, embodying the kemetic principal of neter neteru, or the hindu equivalent, where deities are all seen as 'one' at the most vast end of their nature, and as personas at the most finite end of their nature. Most true deities will likely will never be written about. And if they are written about extensively, then the public will create a sort of egregore based on them, and then wander off following their creation, instead of the actual being it's based on.

This post has been edited by Kath: Jul 19 2010, 01:12 PM


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Mchawi
post Jul 28 2010, 03:23 AM
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Eat all you want... no harm done.

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Mchawi
post Jul 28 2010, 03:52 AM
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That being said I understand the specifics... practice Moolah Banda or retention and have been hit with a need for Yin energy of late, water to sooth the fire. Perhaps I should turn my focus to the moon somemore but sexually speaking its difficult not "feeding off" or thinking of women just to get some sleep at night... this is, of course, quote normal unquote for someone my age (26) but ethically speaking its wrong. I'm a practicing magician not a psy vamp.

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kaboom13
post Jul 28 2010, 12:41 PM
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Lucid dreams are a skewed rendition of astral projection. Go eat your pretty fantasies there. Trust me, it works.

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Voluntas
post Aug 11 2010, 06:53 AM
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QUOTE(Kath @ Jul 19 2010, 09:09 PM) *

um, my definition of a 'true deity' is just "an infinite being". which is kinda a paradox, because how can something infinite have a finite persona? but I have it on good authority that such a paradox is possible. The result would be a being which is both finite and infinite. I think of this as something which 'evolves' rather than being made. buddha might qualify. I think some true deities are 'ex humans'. there's no heirarchy, they sort of 'merge'. all infinite beings are kinda like siamese twins with each other. the paradoxical state I mentioned allowing them to manifest as personalized faces of an impersonal infinite.


Having only just recently started to interest myself in the occult i was under the impression that most, if not all, deities were toughtforms.
I find this distinction between godlike toughtforms and 'true deities' quite interesting and so i wonder, have you ever met one of these deities yourself?

Thanks in advance,

Voluntas

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