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 That Pesky Thing Called Cancer
amongthehidden
post Jan 26 2012, 07:22 PM
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So, I recently was told that my grandmother (that I am extremely close to) has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. They do not know what stage it is in, but she is going for major surgery next Friday. She already has diabetes, which is definately not helping. She was diagnosed four days ago (Monday), which was the same day that I woke up and thought "What if I lose my grandmother? What if she gets cancer?". And, as previously stated, I learned of this today. I have also experienced unknown, dull feelings of uncomfort in the pancreatic area this week. It really kinda makes me want to yell at myself for not trusting my intuition, which as we all know, is meant to be trusted.
So, I guess I'm just really asking for help and support, as well as some prayers. I realize this is not a prayer request website, but at this point, does it really matter? Also, I've been trying to tell her that I am a Hellenic Polytheist and that I practice witchcraft and shamanism (no drugs here, however, I think I'll skip those.) and now feel like it would just add to her burdens because she is Christian, and she has this solid idea of who I am, so much so that when I told her two years ago that I was "not Christian", she said "Yes, you are." Do any of you have advice, or even first-hand experience of this kind of scenario? And if you have any advice of magical ways to help out, besides lighting a candle and doing a simple healing spell, it would be much appreciated. The whole me telling her I am a Hellenist part plays in out of respect and morals, where many people (including myself) feel obliged to tell someone if we are doing a spell on them, at least healing-wise. (Because telling someone you are going to curse them isn't usually a smart idea.)

Again, help is greatly appreciated.

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Vagrant Dreamer
post Jan 27 2012, 12:17 AM
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When your grandmother passes, she'll know where you stand spiritually and understand the truth of matters. Though she may have prejudice in this life, in the space between she will lose all of these things. That said, if you feel that in order to have closure you must talk about these things with your grandmother, then realize that one of the great regrets of the dying is that they lived with too many illusions in life. I have worked hospice care with a lot of terminally ill patients, every one of them passed on, some in pain, and some very peacefully. Almost all of them at one point or another expressed a wish that they had been more honest about themselves, and that they hadn't driven away someone close to them. Often times those people came back and had their final words, and cleared the air, but sometimes they didn't.

We have no power over life and death, and we aren't meant to. Sometimes when it is time, it's time. What's important is that we are able to understand that for those that go on ahead of us, while we may miss their presence in our lives, they are going on the great adventure, finally getting to know where we go afterwards, and learning the answers to the questions they had in life. And although your grandmother may be christian, and you may be a hellenic polytheist, the connecting thread there is that you both have faith in a higher power. Neither of you is right or wrong on that point, so consider how important it is for you to make that distinction to your grandmother - can you honestly say that you do not feel there is an overarching unity to creation? That amidst all the seperation of the material world, underneath and beyond it there is still separateness? Whether you believe in one God or a million, is a meaningless distinction in terms of faith. Decide if you need to have that conversation in order to have closure. Is it worth pointing out to a loved one your difference of opinion, above and beyond connecting to them on the even more personal level of undifferentiated faith?

Before having this conversation and asking your grandmother if she will allow you to perform a healing ritual, ask instead if she feels she's lead a fulfilling life, if she feels she's ready for the next step - if she isn't, then talk to her about why, what she feels is left undone, what you can do to help her in that way. That is far more important than recovering from the illness, and really, it's entirely possible that going through that kind of healing process will renew her will to live as well as help her overcome her last fear of death. These two things are not the same, but they are mutually exclusive - a strong will to live is not born out of the fear of death, nor is the fear of death born of the will to live. If you want to help your grandmother in a real and meaningful way, help her on her own terms. I do not mean this to sound critical of your motives, please believe me, but in a way seeking to help her on your terms is a selfish intention, and shows a lack of faith in her faith. You might be surprised at what you learn from your grandmother in this process. It never ceases to amaze me the kind of wisdom that arises from the knowledge that one's death may very well be approaching, and the most important thing to a person in that position is that they strengthen what connections to their loved ones they have before they go, emboldened by the knowledge that they will not be forgotten.

You have my sympathies, but also my prayers that this will be an experience that shows you the true depth of your grandmother's spirit.

peace


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Agata
post May 27 2012, 04:13 PM
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QUOTE(amongthehidden @ Jan 26 2012, 08:22 PM) *

So, I recently was told that my grandmother (that I am extremely close to) has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. They do not know what stage it is in, but she is going for major surgery next Friday. She already has diabetes, which is definately not helping. She was diagnosed four days ago (Monday), which was the same day that I woke up and thought "What if I lose my grandmother? What if she gets cancer?". And, as previously stated, I learned of this today. I have also experienced unknown, dull feelings of uncomfort in the pancreatic area this week. It really kinda makes me want to yell at myself for not trusting my intuition, which as we all know, is meant to be trusted.
So, I guess I'm just really asking for help and support, as well as some prayers. I realize this is not a prayer request website, but at this point, does it really matter? Also, I've been trying to tell her that I am a Hellenic Polytheist and that I practice witchcraft and shamanism (no drugs here, however, I think I'll skip those.) and now feel like it would just add to her burdens because she is Christian, and she has this solid idea of who I am, so much so that when I told her two years ago that I was "not Christian", she said "Yes, you are." Do any of you have advice, or even first-hand experience of this kind of scenario? And if you have any advice of magical ways to help out, besides lighting a candle and doing a simple healing spell, it would be much appreciated. The whole me telling her I am a Hellenist part plays in out of respect and morals, where many people (including myself) feel obliged to tell someone if we are doing a spell on them, at least healing-wise. (Because telling someone you are going to curse them isn't usually a smart idea.)

Again, help is greatly appreciated.

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Google "Soursop" It grows in Jamaica and I have heard Google things about it from a Jamaican man. No personal experience with it. Good luck. I'm sorry I am so late with this and hopefully not too late. Another idea is to try Lucky Mojo. I don't think granny would mind magic in the form of proverbs. She doesn't have to know everything about it. I think you can also use catholic saint statues to represent a god/goddess.

Peace

This post has been edited by Agata: May 27 2012, 04:34 PM

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☞Tomber☜
post May 28 2012, 03:54 PM
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QUOTE(Agata @ May 27 2012, 05:13 PM) *

Google "Soursop" It grows in Jamaica and I have heard Google things about it from a Jamaican man. No personal experience with it. Good luck. I'm sorry I am so late with this and hopefully not too late. Another idea is to try Lucky Mojo. I don't think granny would mind magic in the form of proverbs. She doesn't have to know everything about it. I think you can also use catholic saint statues to represent a god/goddess.

Peace


I just checked out that "lucky mojo" site. If cheesyness were a substitute for authenticity, Vagrant Dreamer might have been up for some serious competition in the talisman retail business. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/laugh.gif)


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Expect nothing, or you will get caught up in the future and not pay attention to the present. Just do the practice diligently, do it because you enjoy it, do it because you believe in it. Don't wait for results, don't wait for it to happen.

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Vagrant Dreamer
post Jun 15 2012, 08:36 AM
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QUOTE(☞Tomber☜ @ May 28 2012, 05:54 PM) *

I just checked out that "lucky mojo" site. If cheesyness were a substitute for authenticity, Vagrant Dreamer might have been up for some serious competition in the talisman retail business. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/laugh.gif)


I wouldn't count them out entirely. Lucky Mojo Curio Co. has been around for a long time, and the people running that place have deep hoodoo roots. The idea that magical objects are difficult to find, or that it's 'silly' to get the local magic practitioner to produce you a powder, talisman, tonic, etc., is relatively new. They took their business and moved it online back in the day. And the names of some of their powders and whatnot, are the kinds of names typically found in hoodoo rootwork. It's a very practical tradition - you call it what it does.

They also have a pretty concentrated collection of written material on their site about hoodoo rootwork as well as it's history. It's worth a read, hoodoo is the product of western grimoire tradition, african magical tradition, and native american shamanism traditions. It's eclectic, but I think you'd find it's more honest about it's nature than most other traditions as well.

peace


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