QUOTE(grim789 @ Jan 13 2010, 09:04 PM)
Ok so i would like to apologize if this is in the wrong spot. Ok well to start off by giving you some background information on what i believe i grew up christian and about a year or so ago i started to wonder why i belive blindly on something i know nothing of so i figured it was do to the fact thats what i have grown up around and my general community is mostly christian. But i have been studying diffrent religions and i know the media makes pagans to be satanist "not to insult anyone who practicess this". But there is something higher than myself telling me to study pagan it has been burning at me for a few months to study it i just have been to lazy honestly. I sayed higher than myself because i meditated on it and have had some thoughts that just says study so im listening to those thoughts. But i need a place to start i have never studyed there teachings dont know any resources to read for them so any help would be GREAT.
Thank you in advance to any post all are welcome.
Not to sound harsh but in my mind Satan was the guy who got the worst deal out of the whole 'christianity' thing. I was raised christian too, I went to the pagan philosophy around your age then finally decided I didn't care what I labeled myself, labels were for other people. If you objectively look at the stories of the christian god (which is difficult because of the vast grain of society tells you this god is loving and caring), it's really amazing to find how silly this being truly is. There are some older jewish myths, dating before that of christianity, and the story goes: God thinks about creating man, God asks angels if this is a good idea, angels say "no we really don't think so", so god banishes them to hell (especially lucifer because of his/her nagging). Interestingly the contradictions are blatantly bizarre:
For 'god' there is no time.
Well, if god knew his right hand would disagree with him and become 'an evil overlord influencing his poor creations' then why did he build him in the first place? Furthermore, why is Lucifer so evil if s/he was god's right hand? How could such an inanely 'evil' being be created by pure 'good'?
Secondly, why would god punish adam and eve for eating the forbidden fruit? Especially if this god knew this would happen, and let it happen (it's as if god made it happen) and here we are to feel guilty about it.
Thirdly the lesser known 'lilith' was adam's first wife, she was made to be his wife. Lilith did not like this, nor would she allow adam to seduce her. Because she didn't submit to adam's and god's wishes Lilith was sent to hell. How very sexist.
These I've handpicked, blind faith is blind period. There are several others if one learns to look objectively it becomes more and more easy. I would suggest going the way of science, learning to become very skeptical. I'm personally very skeptical, especially when it comes to magick and the supernatural. Otherwise I would be learning nothing. It's very good for the practitioner to believe in something s/he later finds to be false, I do this a lot and I find it's experience enlightening. I wrote you a poem earlier, you may not remember it. It was a poem to Lucifer, thanking him/her for enlightening the human race, if it were not for her/him in the mythos of christianity we would still be apes (the similarities between evolution from the forests and genisis are striking).
breaker of veils.
Lamb of man.
Mephistopheles is basically the devil from the play Faust (a german play by Goethe). The devil (in genesis) is very much like the modern day Prometheus, s/he went out of his way to aid humanity, (s/he was the first true humanist, making man like god) thus "lamb of man". For it s/he got punished severely, even today we look at this being as an intrinsic evil. Though when we look at the books of paul, john, etc. the devil in this sense is an act of the subconscious which we must rid ourselves, for instance when jesus is out in the barren wastes with "lucifer" he is 'tempted' to use his powers to create bread to eat, also he is tempted to use his powers for great monetary value (which every true magician must face from time to time.)
Write yourself a code of Ethics (not morals, for morals are for the general populous) and follow them. Mine are as follows:
1. Do not steal private property.
2. Do not kill under the act of cruelty
3. Do not cheat with thy lover.
4. Do not waste time (romantically) with people in a relationship.
5. Weigh all actions thoughtfully, to the best of ability.
The reason why I put these down are for an example. To be an experienced magician you must know and stick to your ethical background, they are yours personally and shouldn't be shared with others for fear of scrutiny, I post mine because I don't care what others think and I feel it is necessary in this situation. Find out who you are, get a feel for your ethics and feelings and once you can do that you are ready to practice magick. Without a solid feeling of who you are, your will becomes as fluid as the chaos around you. Find something solid to hold on to before you give yourself a Cosmic-Swirlie.
Fortune Favors Fools,